2005sep23. More tinkering with Macros. Still on “G,” with occasional forays into earlier/later letters as old email messages burble up to the surface.
Do you want to fight, or do you want to surf!
This is from Apocalypse Now, when Kilgore (Robert Duval) implores the young
PBR operator (Sam Bottoms) to make a choice. It is best when bellowed in
a Duval-like hoarseness to an indecisive friend. It can also be altered
in other situations when an immediate choice is needed, such as “Do you
want to fight, or do you want to drink (or shop, or drive, or something
like that).” (brody 2001)
GIT-R-DONE®
What is to be done? “R” is to
be done. Somehow, through the divine blessings of Baby Jesus, I was able
to avoid this particular phrase until the summer of 2005. This is the catch
phrase of “Larry the Cable Guy,” apparently a regular fixture on the Blue
Collar Comedy Tour. There are “Git-R-Done®” ringtones (“You know you’re
a redneck™ if your cellphone rings and it’s coming from inside your
hot cousin!”), a book, a DVD, a Git-R-Done™® Rebel Advantage Classic
Hat (Camo), a Git-R-Done® Tropical Get-A-Way T-Shirt (Light Blue), etc.
I have yet to actually hear this phrase spoken – I am only familiar with
the phrase through my initial sighting (Git-R-Done® Window Lettering)
and follow-up online research. Spoken in same guttural tone as LIFT IT
UP. At least one t-shirt transfer shop
(they still exist?) has been spanked for copyright infringement (“G17221
$1.05 It now says GET-ER-DONE”).
LIFT IT UP
At some point in the distant past all of my friends and I went nuts and
bought $100 remote-control trucks. We invented a game, Truck Soccer,
played with a real soccer ball. After awhile, I acquired a used remote-control
CAT front-loader and had intended to sabotage an upcoming Truck Soccer
game with its wily loading and fronting. But all it could do is bray “LIFT
IT UP” in a guttural construction worker-like voice when you pushed a little
speaker button, just like real CAT front-loaders. It refused to LIFT IT
UP, or even move, really. A sad memory. Spoken in the same manner as GIT-R-DONE.
Please
stand clear of the doors. Por favor, mantenganse alejados de los puertas.
English part delivered in wooden white-guy voice, Spanish part delivered
in slightly accented, exotic wooden white-guy voice. Use in, uh, in automatic
door situations. (britain w 1997)
In other news, I am a big fan of fruit leather. For eating.